Coping with sadness and depression: Understanding the causes, caring for your mental health, and overcoming it on your own.
Some days I wake up feeling exhausted even before doing anything. My heart feels heavy, my thoughts are slow, I don't want to talk to anyone, I feel inadequate, or I can't see the future.
If you're experiencing this, you're not weak, and it doesn't mean your life is a mess. Mental distress can happen to anyone, from students and working adults to those caring for families and even those with physical limitations or who are dependent on others for certain things.
This article will explore the root causes of depression, discouragement, and hopelessness, how to care for your mental health, and when to seek help from those around you or a professional.
What can cause a state of depression?
Feeling down doesn't have a single cause. Sometimes it stems from obvious events like failing an exam, breaking up, losing a job, or arguing with family, and various losses. But sometimes it accumulates silently until one day you feel unknowingly exhausted.
Stress that accumulates beyond one's capacity.
Even small amounts of stress, if experienced daily, can lead to mental exhaustion. For example:
Constant pressure from work or studies.
Not enough money or in debt.
Losing a loved one
Disappointment or being tempted.
I have to take care of the people in my house.
Too much was expected of them.
There's really no time to rest.
I have to force a smile even though I'm exhausted inside.
Many people don't realize they're stressed because they think, "Everyone's like this," and so they keep suppressing it until their body and mind start sending signals such as insomnia, headaches, increased or decreased appetite, irritability, or crying without a clear reason.
Disappointment and feelings of worthlessness.
Depression is often intensified when we interpret events as our own failures, such as failing an exam or being cheated and thinking, "I'm stupid," making a mistake at work and thinking, "I'm worthless," or being rejected and thinking, "Nobody wants me."
This kind of thinking sinks deep into heartache, because we're not just hurt by the event itself, but also by the words we repeatedly say to ourselves.
Try to observe how you talk to yourself on days when you're feeling down. If the answer is to scold, belittle, criticize, or constantly compare yourself to others, that might be one of the reasons why your mood remains depressed for longer.
Isolation and the lack of a safe space.
Some people are surrounded by many people but still feel isolated because there's no one they can talk to comfortably, no space to speak the truth without being judged.
Teenagers may be afraid that adults won't understand them.
Employees may be afraid that their colleagues will perceive them as incompetent.
People with disabilities or those who are unable to care for themselves may be hesitant to tell their caregivers that they are feeling bad.
People who have been deceived, no matter what the reason, are afraid of losing face and dare not tell anyone.
These feelings cause us to keep everything to ourselves, and the more we keep it inside, the heavier our hearts become.
A tired body can also make your mind feel bad.
The mind and body are not completely separate. If you get insufficient sleep, eat irregularly, suffer from chronic illness, experience constant body aches, or haven't left your room for a long time, your mood can also decline.
Some people start with physical fatigue, but prolonged fatigue leads to mental discouragement. Others begin with mental stress, which then manifests as chest tightness, stomach pain, shortness of breath, or easy exhaustion.
This doesn't mean you're imagining things, but it's a sign that both your body and mind need care.
Pay attention to the signs that you need care.
Sadness is a normal emotion, but if it persists, affects your life, or makes you feel like you don't want to live anymore, it should be taken seriously immediately.
Try checking yourself without judgment.
Feeling sad, empty, or irritable frequently.
I don't want to do things I used to like.
Sleeping too much or having trouble sleeping?
Easily tired, no energy.
Eating more or eating much less.
Shorter attention span makes studying or working more difficult.
Blaming myself repeatedly.
I don't want to see anyone.
Feeling hopeless, or thinking it would be better if you disappeared.
If these symptoms persist for several days or weeks, don't wait for them to worsen. Early care leads to a smoother recovery.
If you experience suicidal thoughts or feel you are losing control, tell a loved one immediately and contact the "Mental Health Hotline 1323" or "Emergency Services 1669".
This content provides general information and is not a diagnosis or treatment in place of a doctor. If symptoms are severe or interfere with daily life, you should consult a mental health professional.
Practical guidelines for self-care of your mental health.
When we're feeling down, we often want an immediate solution. But the mind isn't like a light switch; you can't just press one and the light turns on. Therefore, caring for your mind starts with small, repetitive actions.
This is a self-care approach to mental health that doesn't require special equipment and can be adapted to each individual's lifestyle.
Reduce the goal to a level small enough.
On days when you're feeling down, setting big goals will make you feel defeated before you even start. Instead of setting a goal like, "Today I have to be the person I used to be," start with something very small, such as...
Get up and wash your face.
Drink a glass of water.
Open the window to let in the light.
Eat a simple meal.
Respond to one important message.
Organize your belongings in just one corner.
Setting small goals doesn't mean you're not trying; it means getting back on your feet one step at a time.
Take care of your basic physical health first.
If your body lacks rest, your mind will find it harder to cope. Try starting with these basics.
Sleep
Try to go to bed and wake up at around the same time. Reduce phone use before bed. If you can't sleep, don't blame yourself. Try getting up and sitting quietly, turning on dim lights, or listening to soft sounds, and then try going back to bed.
food
You don't need to eat clean or prepare complicated meals. Just ensure your body gets enough energy, such as rice, eggs, vegetables, fruits, milk, water, or easily digestible foods. If you find it hard to eat, start with small bites.
sunlight and air
Getting some natural sunlight in the morning or evening helps your body regulate its day-night rhythm. If you can't leave the house, open the curtains, sit near a window, or have someone help you get some fresh air outside.
Reduce things that cause you deep emotional distress.
Some things unintentionally make you feel worse, such as comparing your life to others, reading stressful news before bed, or revisiting old, painful photos.
Try setting small boundaries, such as:
Take a break from watching emotionally charged content.
Turn off notifications for some apps.
Don't discuss serious topics late at night.
Avoid making major decisions when you're feeling down.
Avoid being alone if you feel unsafe.
Taking a break from triggers isn't about escaping problems, but about giving your mind the strength to return and deal with them.
Techniques for managing emotions when feeling depressed and discouraged.
Coping with hopelessness and discouragement doesn't mean getting rid of the sadness immediately, but rather preventing yourself from sinking deeper and gradually regaining your strength.
Try a short meditation, it doesn't have to be perfect.
Many people hear the word meditation and think it means sitting still for long periods without thinking about anything. In reality, it doesn't have to be that difficult.
Try this simple method.
Sit or lie down in a comfortable position.
Place your hands on your stomach or chest.
Breathe in slowly, counting from 1 to 4.
Exhale slowly, counting from 1 to 6.
Repeat for 3 to 5 rounds.
If your thoughts wander, become aware of them and bring your focus back to your breath. Don't scold yourself. Bringing your focus back is the practice itself.
If you feel uncomfortable during meditation, try observing your surroundings instead. For example, see five things, hear four things, and feel three things. This method helps bring your mind back to the present moment.
Move your body as much as you can.
Exercise doesn't have to be strenuous, long-distance running, or going to the gym. The important thing is to get your body moving.
Try choosing based on your physical condition.
Walk slowly around the house for 5 minutes.
Stretch your neck, shoulders, back, and legs.
Swing your arms gently.
Turn on the music and start moving.
Perform the exercises on your bed or on a chair.
Have a caregiver gently assist with moving their limbs if they have limited ability to help themselves.
After moving your body, your mood may not improve immediately, but many people will feel less tense, breathe easier, or fall asleep more easily. That's already progress.
Write down your thoughts to reduce the noise in your head.
When you overthink, your head fills with blame, fear, and unanswered questions. Writing helps to separate these thoughts from yourself.
Try writing something short and simple, without needing to be fancy.
What am I feeling right now?
Which one is the most difficult?
What do I need right now?
What are some small things that can be done in 10 minutes?
If my friend encountered this, what would I say to him?
The last sentence is very helpful because we are often kinder to others than to ourselves. If you can speak gently to your friends, you deserve the same.
Talk to close friends or family without having to explain everything.
When we're feeling down, we might think we need to explain everything before asking for help. But that's not actually necessary.
Let's start with simple sentences, such as:
"I'm not feeling well lately. Could you stay and keep me company?"
"We don't want advice right now, we just want you to listen."
"Could you please call us today?"
"Could you please take me to see a doctor or consultant?"
"I don't want to be alone tonight."
If the first person doesn't understand, it doesn't mean your feelings aren't important. Try telling someone you trust, such as a friend, teacher, relative, caregiver, supervisor you can talk to, or someone in your community who feels safe to talk to.
When should you seek professional help?
Taking care of yourself is important, but sometimes we need more help. It's like when you're physically ill; sometimes rest is enough, but sometimes you need to see a doctor.
You should seek help when you experience these signs.
Feeling sad or empty for extended periods makes life difficult.
Absent from school, absent from work, or unable to perform their usual duties.
Severe insomnia or sleeping excessively for several days.
Unable to eat, losing weight, or eating so much that it's difficult to control.
Using alcohol or drugs to escape feelings.
Feeling worthless, hopeless, or not wanting to live.
Having thoughts or plans to harm oneself.
Seeking professional help doesn't mean you're "crazy" or "weak," but rather that you're taking self-care seriously. Mental health professionals can listen, assess your symptoms, and suggest ways to improve your life.
If you don't know where to start, try beginning with a healthcare facility near your home: a public hospital, a mental health clinic, your school counselor, a local support agency, or the mental health hotline 1323.
For those who have difficulty traveling or are limited in their ability to care for themselves, be upfront and tell your caregiver that this condition is affecting your daily life and that you need assistance. Don't wait until a crisis occurs before you deserve care.
How to help yourself on days when you feel really down.
Some days, lengthy instructions might be too difficult. If today is particularly tough, just stick to this short plan.
Get yourself to a safe place.
If you are near sharp objects or anything that could be used to harm yourself, move away or ask someone else to pick them up.
Contact one person immediately.
You don't have to tell everything. Just say, "It's not safe for you right now. Please stay with us."
Breathe slowly 5 times.
Place your feet on the ground. Acknowledge that your body is still here.
Postpone the decision.
Tell yourself, "Don't make any decisions tonight. Just get through this hour."
Seek emergency assistance if you lose control of yourself.
Call 1323 for mental health support or 1669 for physical and safety emergencies.
Remember that thoughts on dark days aren't the whole truth of life. They're a sign that you're hurting a lot and need someone to support you.
Take the next step without rushing.
Overcoming feelings of sadness isn't something that can be conquered solely through strength. Often, what helps is gentleness, consistency, and allowing others to help when needed.
You might not be ready to start all over again today, and that's okay. Start with the smallest things. Drink a glass of water, wash your face, text someone, and take another slow breath.
If that's all you can do, then you're taking care of yourself.
And if there's ever a day when you feel like you can't bear it anymore, don't force yourself to cope alone. Help is available. You deserve to be heard, cared for, and given the opportunity to gradually get better in your own way.
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